After reading David's essay, here are some comments that I wish to highlight.
Paragraph 3
Would you have evidences or sources to support " trees in forest help to store excess rainwater to precent soil erosion"?
Paragraph 4
Can I know how scrublands and grasslands regulates purify water? Are you refering to scrublands and grassland purify water?
Paragraph 5
Where did you get this information - "Research has shown that enzymes from some inserts can produce enzymes that can break down agricultural waste and the by-product can be use as a form of bio-fuel"? Is it from Turner, Oppenheimer & Wilcove, 2009, p.278? You did nt cite your origin.
Overall the eassay has full the requirement. There are grammars that require changes. Please look out.
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Thank you David for your review.
ReplyDeleteI have noted down the feedback and will amend my essay accodingly.
For paragraph 3, I found the information on the Food and Agriculture Organisation of the United Nations.
Regards to paragraph 4. No, I am not refering that scrublands and grassland purify water. The forests regulate and purify water supplies and to reduce erosion. The grassland has different layers of soil that increases the infiltration and filtering capacities of the water in the ground. The ground water will flow to nearby rivers.
Lastly, paragraph 5. I have taken noted of the mistake. I will add in the source.
Thank you.
Paragraph 3
ReplyDeleteWould you have evidences or sources to support " trees in forest help to store excess rainwater to precent soil erosion"?
-Geography Textbook
- Anyway I decide to leave this out of the paragraph as this evidence is too weak
Paragraph 4
Can I know how scrublands and grasslands regulates purify water? Are you refering to scrublands and grassland purify water?
- Yes, I will improve this line.
Paragraph 5
Where did you get this information - "Research has shown that enzymes from some inserts can produce enzymes that can break down agricultural waste and the by-product can be use as a form of bio-fuel"? Is it from Turner, Oppenheimer & Wilcove, 2009, p.278? You did nt cite your origin.
- Yes, evidence is from Turner, Oppenheimer & Wilcove.
Overall the eassay has full the requirement. There are grammars that require changes. Please look out.
- I will amend those grammatical errors.
From the review given by Han Xiong and Ms Lee, I felt that in Academic Writing, planning and drafting is very important. It gives me a general guideline so that I will not write out of point. I understand that I need to improve on my grammar skills and to check my essay before I submit. No matter how good my content is, if my spelling and grammar is incorrect the reader will not have a good impression of my work. Thus, affecting my overall grades.
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